26/08/2023

 Dear Diary,

I don’t think Diary you have any idea what kind of pain I’m going through I have no idea Castpavi Nu Naam over acting or over exaggerating but there is no inti Noda single day I go to bed just sharing my tears all all night when it’s like every day cycle but I am in Parth there is no one to support me in this world Nu179SelvamThoughtsComeToMyMind Paadu Arundhati Shubh self harm myself I am really really unhappy with my shopping and really really unhappy with whatever the situation I am I just do not want to live in this because this Home has become so bad please for me Krishna positive there and 30 Rahul actually love me I don’t think they don’t even care what my life is N is it going to matter.

This life is what I never thought I will be end but sometimes I’m really grateful like I’m always for the money for the work that I have done I’m really worked hard for everything that I’ve been to me really want to do a lot in my life and I don’t know how it’s gonna be done but I am really want to tell you that I have Vagad anyhow just getting any not to show anybody else in this world I don’t think any money and happiness and satisfaction and peace of mind in my mind that I might be getting I don’t know with this Jewish and negativity I’m not able to cope up it’s been 2019 to 2023 it’s been four years and I have no idea what’s going on I have no idea why people don’t support me I have no idea why these parents all mine Else not I always order in these four walls I can’t grow my brain and my career I I just can’t see myself with this negativity and with this thing I have just got four months from them and they’re not even able to Renu settle down always I don’t know what’s wrong with me what’s wrong I’m doing this word is there to stand up for me the life as hell I live in San can’t believe I’m so away from all the lab ones maybe one time Devadhai with me now I have nobody this is when never thought I will be but I am I don’t know how it’s gonna end and 26 it’s 2023 already Best music special Kya Hai Hungama idea how much features going to be I am no idea how I am going to live my life going to be in what way in what direction I need you wanted life to really be happy and I am I have no idea literally I am just so disappointed with what I am I am so really don’t want to focus on negative things but I am really trying every day per Cheluve I just came out of this anxiety disappointment depression I think I am in that phase only from last two years and nobody can help me in this I can motivate myself and I do not find any way is north food give me happiness nor navigation because things are all ways around these I really wanted to be out follow just wanted to live I just wanted to have me in whatever way possible I am sure sure universe am not Kona rebels anything bad ones I am in Mumbai with this patent office a job I’m gonna leave my life alone be the happiest one till December I really wanted to be in don’t want myself to be here leaving I just have become so isolated so alone so insecure and so unhappy I am not able to find any happiness nearby the people over there with me I have no idea what’s going on but I am I have no energy to counsel anybody evlo energy to do anything else I am so so so so left out app no idea how WhatsApp gonna do I don’t think anything is going to work for me people never understand me they will be say no this that but they have no idea from which zone have come from be here sitting in front of you now after five years has made me what I am it was just my struggle man The people showed me an otherwise I didn’t have anything else it was this may get strong feeling diwas Nu support I can’t find it anywhere else was so bad for me they navigate the rebellious and convention the not so good girl and that’s how my journey begins because that was not me I was very sensitive always have always doing the things always sacrificing and I really want to go out of that so I don’t think anybody can understand this uncertain phase of life you actually understand that only you are the video and you have to keep yourself motivated you can’t stop feeding yourself because the dream that you have thought when you were 16 you can’t believe that she have to be a part of it and for that that used to actually work really hard and there are new people who had a success story to be success story of every lower middle-class girl has actually achieved every thing with the capability because nobody was there no but there is just a lot of judgement and lot of differentiation a lot of narrowmindedness a lot of Kondaveeti a lot of nonsense no festival feel happiness Nu put the film new any hacking my hubby hubby location feels like that to be like I am going to have fun it’s nothing like that I am a rat race I am in a trap I really want to be in retrospect out of this Hun I’m out of this whole living my life in Mumbai

People who are close to me know me ever thought that I’m going into depression and I have no happiness from inside I am nothing I am nosy to do anything but I’m just leaving or you might say yeah or you might say I’m just surviving because I have new zeal to do anything else I’m so fucked up and I have nothing to be happy about I am finding happiness but there is no happiness I can’t find it I have no idea

A ball is put up in a lot of pressure I don’t think I have a lot of pressure I have been given a lot of pressure just to make sure that I have to do this I will do that act complete this but never think that should I be loud should I like should I love no I am such a pressurised person and never been asked that I really wanted to do this or not there is always a lot of pressure has been put up in my brain that I have no idea how to cope up with this really wanted to just add my life really like really I wanted it but I have so much dreamt of and these are my dreams and I don’t think the childhood Ayushi will be so proud of me Naam because I’m not doing what I likeदोनों ne साथऔर thing of arc अरे जिसकी raksha हर rally point