10Nov2023

 Dear Diary,

Dear diary I don’t know what to talk in hotel say sometimes I feel like I need a friend and I need a boyfriend and I need a psychiatrist Bada Doon home I need exactly so I’m just telling you every thing to you because you are my only loving secret diary I don’t know what would’ve done if you were not there I don’t know your face a lot of rejection in my life and This has been one of them and not being a pound of Vedantu Endendu that sat exam Endendu by Jews are than Tum so many rejections Nagada don’t know what is happening from 2020 1181 810 1 23 I have no idea I am 26 and 2023 is going to end in just one month and I do not have any time do not have any option I ready want to go out and live in Mumbai or abroad and if my acting life that I always wanted to know and give me hundred percent I don’t know sometimes I feel like hopeless anxiety stress De stress depression very negative I don’t know what to do sometimes very happy and sometimes I’m not I’m trying to cope up with so many things be eight reading books be alert going to Temple be eight but nothing is going to work nothing else I don’t know relatives I have become change money has become a problem now with friends and relatives and everyone and going out also I don’t know what am I doing what’s happening I’m really grateful that I have to have six lakh rupees I have a lot of cold I’m going to buy silver by now I am really help I am really happy that I have all these metals I’m living with my family everyone is healthy happy doing great I don’t know via flight game Na void in just my home in my room only having this thing every thing is just chilled Oru Nu WhatsApp nine Vizag happening or how is it going to be but I am really very happy feeling very glad that I am with my family have money every thing the job that I have people white grape where they don’t even have this some have this exam boon for me and I am very happy and blessed for it and I have I am having PlanetS Pagal say but I don’t know sometimes I am like like a four lakh rupees and 86000,00 rupees more I need 61,00,00,000 rupees more because I’ve seen people of my age getting appreciated have a lot of money going with private jet have carved bungalow house travelling a lot having the best life they want they have their boyfriend they have they sat life they are be married or having kids have abundant amount of money that way I feel like that I want clothes I want to travel I wonder man I want the bungalow Kar Lakshman things in my life as well but I don’t know I am doing great or not I don’t know it’s 26 I’m not saying I’m complaining now but by the grace of God I have a lot of things but the small small things maybe I’m doing something wrong Hadid people in many ways I don’t know how to do that I will not do anything wrong by no yaar I have just lost four lakh rupees already and our village what’s happening or please NCC and their weather on don’t want to revise and recall anything that has happened that has happened now I want to enrol in PhD in MJPRU which is actually a really wanted to do as I been part of five-year iOS code of Mumbai or somewhere else leave my life peacefully Idu auditioning undo my life other I don’t want to have a regret yaar I just want to work on my body go to gym go to Theatre go to library these things are really wanted to inculcate in my life good food you know help my family and lot of things are really wanted to know know how to do it how to start it nothing is going in great way but I need a lot of motivation I really need it I am going to do it and how it any cost I don’t know I’m just focusing on my life because yes it’s really hard being the elder one everybody’s looking up to you advice I’m welcome the failure like I’m got a lot of black hundred fail years till now I have gotten this has actually made me so weak all that and bad thing happened like my money is deducted things Kon I got rejected as dad Enna also Indus PhD form this has happened I don’t know how to deal with it I really want something to happen or something I am going to change I really want I don’t know what I’m going to do but I am Munduku Radha exam only this only is my mind to go to Mumbai and live my life because I don’t find anything else other than that I am not able to find anything yaar it’s really going over my head I am very nonsense I am very stupid I don’t know how to do things I’m so annoyed by the fact that whatever I am doing I have no idea like a WhatsApp Ni have no idea what’s going on I have no idea I really have to work on myself on my skills working on the skills is really in portent otherwise nothing is going to help that case with the Dadi actually I’m doing something it can be dance belly dance Kathak Nagar it can be swimming it can be like French learning anything it it can women are really wanted to work on myself Yaris 26 of deaf thought that I am I will be like the best actress Paina Ananda Marie Janu baby Navratnam never thought about it but one thing that has been a new stick to mama and Devinder Inte Suna have money because I have to get back my cousin timer Patiale home land bank it out any cost and I really wanted to be stab list actress living in Mumbai and I am having a lot of money with my NGO my school college Hotel restaurant bungalow calls everything that is owned by Me thank you so much God but I really wanted six root 600 crore Rs.10 30 years age of my life I will work my ass off I don’t know I’m doing smart work hard work whatever the work but I really want the way really want to put where in I can work I have no idea to go to Bhuvan huduku the three years of new idea Mane FC people like they getting married they do job going abroad having saddled Sapne London but I’m in a middle stage a really wanted a live a really wanted a job that I really love look up to really wanted to settle things of my own owned by me and then a man who man look up to and then my family and every thing like that yeah really wanted a lot of things really wanted these things happen please please I will work her thank you thank you thank universe for every thing I’m really thankful grateful place but up new idea what has happened I know I am missing address the timing of life and what is the timing I have no idea please I am trusting you please help me I know I am in finite I’m doing great every thing is going great but I really wanted all my answers Diwali Holi words all feel like the same I don’t feel like celebrating anything more the word nor any festival because you know your food also if you have money also have family also if you are going to shopping malls and nothing is making you nothing is fixing the standard your mind is distress I don’t know what’s happening with my mind my mind wanted to live in Mumbai try for acting coach when I see this things happening around mean they are doing this they are doing this Dadi Inte is God Unjalaadaam where am I right I want to go in that video was doing everything right I was the young one of a big (UM-DAE)‘s brother is going to complete school he’s Gundu NDA my sister has completed MBA she’s going to work in what am I doing nothing I have to work please God show me the Pada really want to go to a Ryan to something I want to to make my parents and teachers proud and to the world new and we do anyone bye now I’ll be so happy kind and generous Nu worries nothing please God please thank you thank you thank universe happy Diwali happy Dhanteras